went town with clara to meet jiamx and melv at wisma coffeeclub. kangwei and adele finally came after i stoned for 1 hour? yeaps. after that me and kangwei went lido she wanted ta buy shirt met victor.. and kailin.. haix. talked ta kailin about the bad news that boss told me last week. after i told kangwei, she asked me if im okay and started searching my face fer any upset expressions but strange enough.. i feel nothing wasnt embittered by disappoinments at all -ponders- after long waits outside the changin room kangx hastily decided cos clara was calling and calling me ta hurry.. errrr she bought this hmmx insect shirt which she insisted was a spider ohwells
watched league of extraordinary gentlemen at lido me, jiamx, del, clara, jac and melv. hehs we cheated again.. bought only 3 tix and 6 six of us went in kangs went fer tuition but jacqie came after her drama! =)) clara and del were fuming when i reached cos the show already started. =/ sorry lerx anyhows, we went in without getting caught hehs again
to jiamie! thank you dearie fer giving me a lift! lalalalalalalaa
Friday, August 15, 2003 @ 4:28:00 PM
yox sighh.. so badmood today. at the library now waiting fer chow and cindy. so HERE i am complaining to my lil blog. i hope they come outta the seminar room soon! i'm like forming cobwebs here grrrrrrrrrr off ta town later.. but my mood's like plunging =/ hmmx. /makes a fugly face.
Thursday, August 14, 2003 @ 11:47:00 PM
yox heh. junz! if you're reading this i wanna tell you that i miss talking to you silly doodle! and seeing your stupid face in the morning.. why you never come to school today!! there arent a lot of things going on dearie.. it's just going out, pigging out slacking here slacking there.. i miss you LOTS and i really mean L O T S. you better come to school tomorrow ah you ass then i can squeeze your stupid face!! -muax- love ya to bits.
@ 11:43:00 PM
im tired..tired..tired.. somebody massage me puh-lease! had 2.4 in the morning todaey. timing 13:57. bloody hell i exhausted every last bit of energy left in me.
anyways, me, tsui, nic, alex and dickson skipped mr chai's math remedial today kinda brave isn't it? and he complained ta jeanyeow!! oh my god. we had ta like go and see her at t10?!?! i can just faint and die on the spot. wish i could morph and seep into the ground man somemore it's MATH remedial! she won't let me off man heh. i was praying along the way feeling SO damn sure that it's gonna be a brutal death fer me..=/ but hey surprisingly she was damn nice about it i was actually kinda touched. /me heaved a gigantic sigh of relief. okaey. from now onwards no more zaoing of math remedials.
after school i was at the grandstand (again!) cos my class having soccer interclass. me, mar and cindy were acting like geeks cos we tried ta dance the family dance :D how idiotic hurhur.. -big wide toothy grins- but i do miss it though.. ooooh stnicks stnicks stnicks.. -laments-
what a joke i actually went fer night study today with dearie jiamx, cindy and clara. it was moderately productive? cos we were singing and going toilet and telling ghost stories.. went home with jiamx, cindy, clara, tavia and jacqie! we were like talking and talking about ghostly encounters and rumours about stnicks. creepy man. -hair stands- if my dearie daddie wasn't waiting fer me at the lift i wouldnt have dared to come home man. eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee -shudders-
@ 12:10:00 AM
to wong kangwei !
the sch was trying to kill us today. project work the WHOLE day! was struggling ta keep awake and alive but when the humid climate and heavy afternoon sets in, i couldnt make it anywhere.
went town after sch with chow and jiam. cind adele came after that. we wanted to watch LXG but when we reach lido it was too late. thanks to too much hesitation and iertia.
went chow's house after that. erm, chow cind jiam attempted to study. i just gave up. fatigue got e better of me you see :/
Tuesday, August 12, 2003 @ 9:52:00 PM
why didn't i do something bout it sooner.. the thought of all these opinions accumulating behind my back is too much to take. really shouldn't have been so immuned about it. but now the comments have come in crashing waves straight at my face. the teases and jokes are not funny okayy.
it's making me feel like fuck. not so much the cliche views and all but the treatment from kaix and jer that makes it worse. maybe it's not worth it. not worth the tactless teasings and jeerings. feels so fucking made use of..as some pathetic, inferior, second-priority in the three-some who has to fuckg withstand pressures to remain so. it's soo not worth it. WHAT. EVER.
time to let selfishness give way to my lil feelings kays. yeah. just let me go lahh!! i wanna go off with other people and rid people of such merciless mentalities. fuck man.
im off to bath and sleep. go awayyyyyyy, won't ya.
@ 8:55:00 PM
this is so fucked up. i don't know what to do! im pissed, and pissed, and pissed, and irritated. blabbers of vicious tongues. fine! walking away, in search of a better life.
the irritation's killing me. feels like a heavy hand's weighing down on me and pulling me down down downnn. sinking.
screams out louuuudd in frustration- i go and eat first. grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
@ 12:46:00 AM
unwell
my back hurts my neck aches my hands are sore my eyes are tired my head is spinning
CINDYYYYYYYYYYYY \\\\\YOU!\\\ i just finished making cind's template fer her but its still kinda plain ohwells. that's like the best that i can do with the time constraints.
we won bball interclass today!! our class vs t23. lol. which is melv's class by the way. but we won 22-14! haha
went j8 with kaix jer amanda kaif tsui and clifford just now. my food sucks! the katsu don was -pukes- so i just eat jer's food instead. his is deer meat. i never eat deer meat before! haha. really im not kidding. looks like beef but taste like chicken, only more tender. now you believe i really never eat deer meat before.
side note: think i kinda pass my math test today. don't know yet. chai giving back tom..
Monday, August 11, 2003 @ 12:00:00 AM
arithmetic is where the answer is right and everything is nice and you can look out of the window and see the blue sky -- or the answer is wrong and you have to start over and try again and see how it comes out this time.
i just finished gorging myself with food after i got home. starving!! when i went jiam's house denise was still there and the two of them were watching this appalling r(a) show. gosh. i can just collapse and die when i saw what was on the tv screen.
basically i did like only 10 questions of math. which was already considered very mind-boggling fer me kayys. denise went home shortly after we climbed up and down the playgrd. me cind jiam then went ta swim. or more like i was floating around on this abandoned boat-float. they tried to teach me how to trap water. oh sheesh i didn't really manage to get it.
anyhows, kw came over at 9 plus and four of us were in jiam's room trying to do math. i was attempting some highly-complicated differentiation probs (: with jiam and kw firing APGP answers across the room. cind just conveniently fell asleep on her econs notes. PIG reincarnate. wasn't very productive uh?
oh!! not to ferget!! i was eating this strawberry yoghurt which i must describe. the yoghurt was mildly sour with a rich creamy, milky taste, engulfing these oh my god small little pieces of strawberry chunks that are like nicely round? (so cute!) the thin layer of skin is like a crunchy piece of strawberry membrane when you chew on it.. wrapping within soft, tender, juicy strawberry flesh. OH overdoing things a lil haha it's just delicious lahh kay. grrrr.
to my horror cind and kw happily decided three things. - take up brazilian martial arts - shave the side of their hair - slits their brows im horrified terrified petrified.
Sunday, August 10, 2003 @ 12:04:00 PM
+ *wishing upon a shooting star* +
heh just woke up. yesterday was rather fun. we pigged ourselves out with all the food that jiamie's mom brought home. bwahahahahha stupid cind was at mar's house and they have even more food than us! nevermind. its OKAYYYYYYYYYYY.
im gonna go jiam's house later (again) with cind. i must get some math done! tom's the test and its sorta an important trigger point. will either be my core striving force from then onwards or just extinguish my enthusiasm and hopes altogether. argh. it's a i-either-get-it-or-i-don't thang.
truth forever
on the scaffold,
wrong forever
on the throne.
yet the scaffold
sways the future,
and behind
the dim unknown,
standeth God
within the shadow,
keeping watch,
above His own.
| verse of the day
| beautiful, i just want you to know, you are my favourite girls
not what my hands have done
can save my guilty soul
not what my toiling flesh has borne
can make my spirit whole
not what i feel or do
can give me peace with God
not all my prayers & sighs & tears
can bear my awful load
Your work alone, O Christ
can ease this weight of sin
Your blood alone, O Lamb of God
can give me peace within
Your love to me, O God
not mine, O Lord, to thee
can rid me of this dark unrest
& set my spirit free
Your grace alone, O God
to me can pardon speak
Your power alone, O Son of God
can this sore bondage break
no other work, save thine
no other blood will do
no strength, save that which is divine
can bear me safely through
i bless the Christ of God
i rest on love divine & with unfaltering lip & heart
i call this Saviour mine
His cross dispels each doubt
i bury in His tomb
each thought of unbelief & fear
each lingering shade of gloom
i praise the God of grace
i trust His truth & might
He calls me His, i call Him mine
my God, my joy, me light
'tis He who saveth me
& freely pardon gives
i love because He loveth me
i live because He lives (:
