fckg pissed..
wads happeng ta me mans..
all e blues r jus catchg up on me mkg my life mirthless..
shooooooooooo!
was quite consoled when found out tt dearie junz was in jus as foul a mood as me.
went off ta town aft sch wif she robin ash aviel n eug ta chill n let out some steam ~
but now! e grouchiness's back.
sth's fckg wrong wif me..
i dun rli care anymore larx!!
*snorts*
e world n its certain remote contents are pissing me off
forming all sorts of jaundiced opinions in my mind.
glowers.
so here i am punchg resentfully at e keyboard cranking my ass off.
some chums are jus so unreliable it infuriates me.
i rli feel impelled ta start e habit of snubbing soon..
dunno why..im dismissing all e reasons posed ta me wif tremendous doubt.
sounds so much lk some lame implausible excuses ta me.
or maybe its jus me..
but somehow, im jus damn impeachable about the credibility of the explanations.
aiya wadeva larx..
growwwwwlllllllss.
fatigue's fillg me wif lethargy n gloom.
further dampen my moods mans.
sheeeeessssh.
in a high-strung mode now yeax? pardon me.
might jus blow anytime so i guess i better vent it all out here before any innocent fellas fall victim ta my horrible temper todae.
dunwna be guilty of hurling any churlish snappings at anybody who dint owe me nutg.
so yeax.
jhusdusudsudsuijdskjdskjdsjdsk!
Monday, September 01, 2003 @ 10:39:00 PM
i look at [u] and i know ure t r o u b l e
i should run just as fast as i can
one smile,
game over.
here in front of you i stand..
i know ure only gonna burst my bubble
trouble is, my heart don't care.
it's ignoring all the danger signs
stop, slow down, take a deep breath, beware.
im not willing to be so fearless..careless..just yet.
cos 'once bitten, twice shy' is what you get.
my heart's got a mind of it's own
won't listen to a word i say
doesn't it know that i get hurt too
when it acts that way-------
cos when it breaks, i break.
i don't know how much more of this i can take..
doesn't it know that i get hurt too
when it acts that way ~
too many times ive witnessed
my heart make a fool of itself.
so sure it's gonna turn out one way
always turns out being something else.
my hearts got a real malfunction
always flipping into over ride.
when i tell it to be sensible
it over rules my cynical mind.
im not willing to be so open..transparent..no not yet.
cos 'once bitten, twice shy' is what you get.
but here in front of you, there's nothin i can do..
my heart's got a mind of it's own
won't listen to a word i say
doesn't it know that i get hurt too
when it acts that way-------
cos when it breaks, i break.
i don't know how much more of this i can take..
doesn't it know that i get hurt too
when it acts that way ~
stop, slow down, take a deep breath, think about what im doing
think about 'once bitten, twice shy'
stop, slow down, take second, before u rush right in
it's gonna be my tears you cry..
@ 9:55:00 PM
had pw meetg todae wif e intention of finishg our final report..
jer chris zyang n nic came my hse in e aftnoon aft mkg me go ta e mrt station ta pick dem up! *frowns*
as usual, we dint get much done though..
cos e lousy labtop which we borrowed fr e sch broke dwn. soo timely..!
lk how great mans ~
it was a lil scary though cos when we plucked out all e wires connected ta it, e power light on e labtop remained on!! hahahahahahas.
aft tt me chris n zyang went amk lib ta meet kang, leavg jer all alone in my hse.
kangx was lk WAD? (shes bewildered by e thot of it)
buden jerome's lk so shou oredi.. not say he'll steal my thgs or wad rite.
e most jus destroy my entire hse lerx hahahahahas.
anyways, e whole world was at e lib lors!!
met shujun again!! hikes!! n lizzie mandy pris xiu ber lionel..
i din rli get anythg done except fer startg e intro fer my jeanyeow essay tts due tom. (pathetic. n im dead fer tom.)
spent most of e time gobbling dwn two plates of seafood spaghetti wif chris n kang. =p
on e wae hme, we took idiotic photos outside jack's place..
tts not e end of my dae YET kaes.
TO MY HORROR, when i reached hme, i found kaix jer n MY mommie sitg side by side on e sofa watchg tv!! ~
lk WOAH.
nice family portrait wifout ME arhs.
how ironic n its MY hse!! hahahahaas.
THEY collaborated wif my mommie ta bully me sumore!! -pouts-
hahahahas. wad a silly pair of jokers.
Sunday, August 31, 2003 @ 11:56:00 PM
jus got hme aft en eventful dae.
and im drained..in all senses of e word.
jerome's daddie was damn funny in e car. (even funnier den fang's corny daddie eh)
i can totally unstd how come jerome turned out lidat..!
jer's parents actually thot tt i was his gf and dey even prepared a few questions ta ask me in e car (!!!wth?)
i penged n died when he silently told me tt at e backseat..using his fone.
no wonder i felt so scrutinized.
so i jus kept my mouth shut throughout e entire journey..
was supposed ta pretend ta be jer's gf at kaix's chalet so tt kaix's nosey aunties wudnt suspect she n jerome.
it obviously din pull off cos i certainly cant act lk one. =/
its beyond me!
anyways when we reached, found out tt kaix's lil cousins are damn cute!!
wooooOoos. tiny bouncy shy little toddlers -lols.
how adorable..
dey r called tian & tong ~ nice names isn it?..
went escape wif kaix jer kaix's sis & cousins.
screaming is reali an effectv wae of destressg mans!
me n kaix screamed our hearts' out (but poor jerome hahas)
in e eveng, wnt town ta meet kangx.
i left escape at 645 lidat & miraculously reached town at 720?
wonders of mrt ~
dis time i remembered ta buy my beloved wang wang nu nai
and kangx finally bought her dream shirt.
went j8 aft tt.
kangx bought yet another shirt..
she's too rich or sth ~
bought sharks' fin again fer our parents.
i love e uncle!! he gave us one bowl fer free..
"loving someone is simple.
reversing e process is complicated n difficult.
along e process u may get hurt so bad
u dun tink u cld love or stand up again.
but amist it all, ul realise tht
frens r lik e catalyst tht will speed u along ur way to recovery.
i jus wan u to knw tht i am one of dem
who'll b der4u till e end."
to jiamx: thx fer joltg me ta my senses dearie n tts why i love u soo much. made up my mind n il go all out ta see tt its done..u noe wad im tokg abt. sighhh dis sucks big time reali.. need u here sigh.
@ 2:23:00 PM
hehs. slept until one sth todae.
-=shuang=-
not gna study todae lerx.
jerome's daddie cumg in ten mins' time.
gg pasir ris fer kaixin's cousin's bdae party or sth ~
its a bbq.. so got lotsa fooooooOOood!
*grins*
truth forever
on the scaffold,
wrong forever
on the throne.
yet the scaffold
sways the future,
and behind
the dim unknown,
standeth God
within the shadow,
keeping watch,
above His own.
| verse of the day
| beautiful, i just want you to know, you are my favourite girls
not what my hands have done
can save my guilty soul
not what my toiling flesh has borne
can make my spirit whole
not what i feel or do
can give me peace with God
not all my prayers & sighs & tears
can bear my awful load
Your work alone, O Christ
can ease this weight of sin
Your blood alone, O Lamb of God
can give me peace within
Your love to me, O God
not mine, O Lord, to thee
can rid me of this dark unrest
& set my spirit free
Your grace alone, O God
to me can pardon speak
Your power alone, O Son of God
can this sore bondage break
no other work, save thine
no other blood will do
no strength, save that which is divine
can bear me safely through
i bless the Christ of God
i rest on love divine & with unfaltering lip & heart
i call this Saviour mine
His cross dispels each doubt
i bury in His tomb
each thought of unbelief & fear
each lingering shade of gloom
i praise the God of grace
i trust His truth & might
He calls me His, i call Him mine
my God, my joy, me light
'tis He who saveth me
& freely pardon gives
i love because He loveth me
i live because He lives (:
