the words you never cared to say just passing me by
this is so funny. i JUST got online. touching up on my blog and then i wanted to check whether my archives are working properly. JUST clicked on one, AND JIAMX CALLED ! so we end up reading the past archives together.. so funny!
this is the first one :-
immediately aft my lsns ended, i ran towards e haunted toilet cos i saw jiamx, yanx, cind, jose & criz outside dere.. jus as i was nearing them i caught a glimpse of yanx stuffing e wang wang into cind's mouth!!! /yunx points finger at yan HOW CAN YOU!?!! what happened next was a whirl of events which was too confusing and chaotic fer me ta illustrate in full details. includes: cind trying ta squash me to death using e toilet door. me raping cind on e toilet floor ta pay ehr back. (which was of course, given another choice, i wud NEVER have done thatt haha) me & cind running after jiam tryg ta bite her. i cldnt catch her!! so i jus bite meiyan instead. hahahah poor thang. jose literally poured water on me when i was charging at her. of course i hav to splash back right.. think we kinda wet a whole stretch of corridor. yanx, criz & jiamx werent able ta escape e violent water battle btw me & jose either.
madness. and thereby the subsequent ones it's like i read something then she goes, "oh my god i remember !" hahas yes, you oughta dear.
whey, WHOOOOO is this person interrupt our call. hun zhang dong xi.. hahahahh
ok as i was saying erm then after awhile we try to find entries with melv yeo and i was like searching and searching but cannot find ! and i don't know how else ta find other than just click on any date? but then we remember the days we always meet before the sup papers ! so yes, i found. the moment me jiam jay and melvyeo get together we take out the cards and that's it :) daidee bridge mahjong bao gah leow. gambling like everyday, in melv/jay's class, cine bowling alley, lido or fareast long john's. or worse, specially arranged go jay's house fer daidee. SPECIALLY MEET FER DAIDEE?! WHAT THE HELL?
ho ho ho and JIAM, all my entries got you lah!? like, every other DAY okay.. we go back sn quite often i realised ! last time i mean. and all the stupid things you did lahhh. jump on the gym trampoline throw the hoolahoop see who can hit the ceiling bi sai monkey bars at the pri playground hide from the siao gong in the balcony posing at the staircase mirror steal chalk
my goodness me.
my goodness me.
sweet reminiscence. but along with it are other wow. i mean like. what the hell was i doing man. what the hell was i doing.
im repeating myself. well..
i can't stop munching on the SD japonais. there're so few in one packet !! and it's so small?! one munch. two munches. three munches. swallow. take another one. i can't seem to start on my IAC report either. that's it ! de hong is going to kill me. anyways i gotta wake up at SIX tomorrow. holly molly ! and meet dehong at the busstop at "645", which is my 7. we have a time difference, apparently.
lastly, cherilyn, sherilyn, cheryleen, sheryleen, sherileen, shirileen, cheryleen wowo so many hurry put down with jiam so she can call me back!!!
Monday, March 07, 2005 @ 11:37:00 PM
i might leave the heat behind cause in the streets im fine
i guess my bestie's alright now. just had a lonnnng talk. well :)
the tuition was smooth just now. the dad never ask anything. well, i should keep waiting. but im really much relieved now! as you can tell.
anyways it's confirmed. the debarredment period is really over. yayy! so i guess i really can don't go fer lessons anymore!!! wheeee. i really shouldn't have gone fer CATS on fri man. waste my precious time aloha. hurry filled in the discussions form then head ta town to meet junz lala alr man. met charleen on the bus and then i practically SENT HER TO WORK cos halfway junz msg and say meet at forever21. so there. lala came looking very pale and worried. make me anxious bout the results also. shopped around fer awhile then went fareast 5th level. we should never eat from there again cos the claypot is not nice! cabbed back ta cj and the driver tried to calm lala down but he is so longwinded we just kept quiet all the way. me and junz wenta sit at the grandstand while waiting fer them. our lil cind's already inside the audi when we reach. since when was she so enthu bout bro paul's talk. anyways there are 6 Fs altogether and 3 of them belong to the same person. the way bro paul announced it it came out really funny. i can just imagine man. junz asked me what's the first thing i think of when i think of cj and i went like bro paul? michael tan? not a very romantic answer. she was expecting like, something along the reminiscing line let me see.. i know! j-!! ha ha ha ha ha. im sucha total retard. aye, cj is so.. ij. delete the guys -tsk
anyhoots im really glad i was the one who opened kaix's results slip fer her! she folded it and didn't dare to see. well. i'll do it! :) and melv yeo my dear ol'friend slimmed down ALOT. is it cos always get chased by wailing ghosts in dark alleys that's why? :) jiam cind lala came and then we headed town alr. went PS this restaurant fer waffles. not nice! but i ate it up anyways. it's acceptable only -do the so-so hand action (righthand 4fings left to right twice) im damn nice i helped lala carry her paper bag! but the lousy string kept coming out. after that me and jiam went ta shaw towers so that she can cut hair. the place is so uluated. well. chow came and cut some stylo hair too. then we went suntec just noodles fer noodles (duh) and they drove me literally crazy. like totally? (bimbo accent) as was in the car. they are CRAZY. nuts. siao.
should i go fer bmgt tutorial tomorrow? -taps index on chin
i feel so edified by all the stuffs im reading. there was confusion as a result of evolutionists' attempt to undermine the Bible's inerrancy with the issue of dinosaurs and extinction then of course i was quite curious and then i read Uncle David's article fer an answer. oh my God lah, he is like HOW wise. totally impressed. they should like mass print his research fer all the newspapers in the world man. not kidding.
my sidlow baxter course start already. it's gonna be a three-year thing. really good! well i have ta sacrifice my alternate saturday afternoons but it's really worth it man. think. the book itself costs a good hundred and ten but the contents are definitely more than this monetary measure. that's how good it is. im quite happy :)
i read this on sunday and i made a mental note to blog it the 17th-century mathematician and philosopher Blaise Pascal, who similarly struggled with issues of meaninglessness, concluded that faith sometimes resembles a wager. he told his friends, "if i believe in God and life after death and you do not, and if there is no God, we both lose when we die. however, if there is a God, you still lose and i gain everything."
@ 2:49:00 AM
in between this moving out to save your soul it came away
i don't feel like going to school tomorrow. why. because i just don't feel like. the debarredment period is already over, or so i heard. so can i just don't go to school. probably could spare me from taking the time to wear contacts, change, make hair, leave the house, go school, sit in class, stone, head straight fer the busstop, in solitude all the way home (and think of whatever things), come back home, and plop myself down feeling i just wasted the past few hours in total zombieness. i really don't feel like.
maybe it's the late night. makes me more off than usual. im seriously strictly non-nocturnal. jay chou is wonderfully therapeutic. and i heard he is attached now! whoever is that lucky biatch.
tomorrow i'll be finding some rubbish work to do when a pile's already waiting. i don't want to go school and do projects. though that's really irresponsible. and perhaps tomorrow would be a really really bad day. i can just see it coming. the tuition..what am i going to tell the father? totally dreading. well, but i'll survive. im sure. honesty is the best policy. but i say honesty, eloquence, and smiles make an even better potion. and we'll see what happens then.
i went to cut my hair today. me and the coconut are sworn twins. well, but it'll become better i guess, in a months' time.. hur.
explanations explanations:
im not upset at all. i RATIONALLY concluded that me talking to you is not going to help an ounce. seriously speaking. trust me not talking is better. cos im not going to support. im not understanding (i certainly do not, do not understand) worse, im gonna scold.
im just cannot relate. cannot be sympathetic towards. my problem is i have a complete scorn for emotional fragility this is bad, cos im losing all the fundamental humanic emotions everybody oughta have. this is really bad..
come to think of it, the stnicks days, the cj days, i guess all the shit back then really polished us well until present day most of us can handle any shit that comes our way.
well, since when do i not. since when do i crumple and cringe. since foreverlong, i do not anymore. superwoman marie yo. displaying of downright vulnerability is just a no-no that's not the way.
for that matter, i cannot stand weakness. let alone repeated weakness. remember what i always say, once, is inevitable. (unless you see it coming) twice, is carelessness (should have gravely remembered the first and be more careful ) thrice? is utter stupidity already. i was talking bout myself but it's the same logic - repeating just will not do. and so, i will definitely scold. definitely. let alone encourage. and SO, probably should STICK to the original plan - and not breathe a word bout it to me. better than get scolding.
indecisiveness can be excused, just take yer time and thinkkkk but ficklemindedness narks me, totally. (indecisiveness means cannot make decisions, ficklemindedness means make decisions already then change. then change. then change again. ) same scenario - repeated yet again you know. same outburst, same REASONS for outburst, same realizations, same APPROACH, same "solutions", later end up at the same place still. whatever for? seriously? this is the last time? the last time also said last time aint it.
that is HOW important directions are. no directions, outburst how many UMPTEEN TIMES ALSO NO USE. true?
decision results in consequences. twist and turn results in even more consequences to bear. and sometimes, my bestie, i think you have too many consequences to shoulder. and soon enough, you're going to collapse, like you are already halfthere (!!!) <--serious.
well with all regards, time and money (of parents especially) should not be impulsively wasted like that. now decide already, don't change again please. decide fer the last time! serious.
im going to sleep. and dreaming of good dreams. because tomorrow is going to be a boring day at home with just me and the tv/food/bed/comp. my net connection's up again by the way. on the 11th after 5pm. then i can embark on the overloaded lists of to-dos and then you'll see many people's blogs change because im the spectacled nerd behind a screenfull of html perfecting the nitty gritty details it just makes me very satisfied.
truth forever
on the scaffold,
wrong forever
on the throne.
yet the scaffold
sways the future,
and behind
the dim unknown,
standeth God
within the shadow,
keeping watch,
above His own.
| verse of the day
| beautiful, i just want you to know, you are my favourite girls
not what my hands have done
can save my guilty soul
not what my toiling flesh has borne
can make my spirit whole
not what i feel or do
can give me peace with God
not all my prayers & sighs & tears
can bear my awful load
Your work alone, O Christ
can ease this weight of sin
Your blood alone, O Lamb of God
can give me peace within
Your love to me, O God
not mine, O Lord, to thee
can rid me of this dark unrest
& set my spirit free
Your grace alone, O God
to me can pardon speak
Your power alone, O Son of God
can this sore bondage break
no other work, save thine
no other blood will do
no strength, save that which is divine
can bear me safely through
i bless the Christ of God
i rest on love divine & with unfaltering lip & heart
i call this Saviour mine
His cross dispels each doubt
i bury in His tomb
each thought of unbelief & fear
each lingering shade of gloom
i praise the God of grace
i trust His truth & might
He calls me His, i call Him mine
my God, my joy, me light
'tis He who saveth me
& freely pardon gives
i love because He loveth me
i live because He lives (: